| Thread Overload |
[Dec. 22nd, 2009|10:16 am] |
I've seen a very cool Christmas idea going around a few places - namely, compliment threads. You leave someone's name in the thread, and the idea is to give them compliments to make their day better.
I haven't linked to any of them because I don't know the people making them - I know, it's completely anti-season, but I'm shy about linking to a friend-frenzy originated by strangers - but ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) shadowwolf13 has started her own. She's got a very nice listing of all the people mentioned thus far (though I dunno how long she'll be able to keep that up), and I figured I'd add mine.
My thread's for my wife zoethe, of course: here it is. If you have nice things to say about Gini, go nuts. |
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| The Weird Part: Simpsons Reflecting Life |
[Dec. 22nd, 2009|09:27 am] |
In the beginning, The Simpsons had two store owners: Apu and Comic Book Guy. Apu would sell anything at the Kwik-E-Mart to make a buck, and Comic Book Guy was an overblown tyrant who'd sell any collectible to make a buck.
Thing was, as time went by, people started to feel guilty about Apu. As an immigrant from India, you could tell that they were a little uncomfortable mocking the American dream so much - here was the guy who came from another land to open up his own shop! Isn't that worthy of being more than just a bit gag?
So they started asking a vital question: "Is there anything else about this guy we should know?" And as it turned out, yes. They started writing episodes that opened up his character - he wasn't just a ripoff artist, but a psychotically hard worker! And a devout Hindu! And proud of America! And a vegan! And a Ph.D. in Computer Science! And now Apu has a wife and too many children, and his relationship has been the focus of more than a few episodes.
They kept deepening who Apu was until he had depth. He's always got his roots in that stereotype of the Indian store-owner, but they've kept adding to him until he's a character in his own right. Because, I suspect, it felt unfair just to leave him stranded as nothing but a stereotype.
Comic Book Guy got no such save.
Comic Book Guy's been the focus of a handful of episodes, but the same could be said of almost any Simpsons character - after 400+ episodes, they're desperate for new plots. But his central character hasn't changed: desperate for women, a blowhard, lives in a basement, has no social life. And, I'd argue, it's because the Simpsons writers (and people in general) feel that the guy at the heart of the Comic Book Guy stereotype largely deserves his fate.
And I can't deny that. I've known too many Comic Book Guys, with their shops and lousy business practices and their focus on making themselves the king of their local nerd cabals rather than running a good business, and I'm pretty much in agreement that they're all just worthy of being mocked relentlessly. Apu got a bad break, and should have been fleshed out. Comic Book Guy? Well, he chose that path. He deserves nothing but mockery.
I just find it interesting that one stereotype got explored until he was a fully-realized character on his own, and the other remains a walk-on gag to say, "Worst. X. Ever."
(Full disclosure: my daughters say that I sound like Comic Book Guy, so feel free to read this entire rant in Comic Book Guy's voice. It's funnier that way.) |
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| Kava |
[Dec. 21st, 2009|11:01 pm] |
Given the general autistic trend towards high anesthesia tolerance and the general weirdness we may or may not have with any mood-altering substance (e.g. dairy makes me drunk), I was wondering if any autistics here are regular users of Kava... not the pills, but the actual south-pacific turn-the-lights-low root beverage. Given my ever-increasing levels of stress and the fact that I feel like I am just one or two steps away from the fabled mid-30's autistic crash, I have made a 2010 new years resolution to drink Kava every night. I was wondering if any others here had any tips, tricks or advice. Thank you.
Edit: No advice will be considered too elemental. For example, having a sweet juice as a chaser is a good recommendation. To pour that juice out of the glass bottle to avoid hitting one's incisors with the bottle due to the lack of coordination is something that common sense would dictate, but I have very little common sense. I have a high degree of uncommon sense, which can be very useful at times. |
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| oh god |
[Dec. 21st, 2009|10:22 pm] |
The week between Christmas and New Year's is traditionally the lowest-traffic week of the year for my site, and I'm gonna be out of town anyway, so I thought I might try something a little different this year. Here's a teaser for my idea:
I've already got the basic idea for the story and will hopefully start working on it before we drive down to Maryland (one advantage of driving down is I can actually bring my big Cintiq with me) for the holiday. Of course, going over my outline and idea list, this might end up being MORE work than the usual QC strips >.<
So uh I no promises yet I guess, but hopefully I won't puss out and will actually get this done. |
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| Zombie Xmas song Sequel: It’s beginning to stink like lots of Zombies |
[Dec. 22nd, 2009|11:11 am] |
Dear Minions
More Christmas Zombie songs. If you are already subscribed to the mailing list, the MP3 is well on it’s way to you. This is a sequel to “Walking in a Zombie wonderland” Which is still available for downloads here
For the rest of you who have just joined in…join the minionship for this sequel. This tune will be made available for a limited 14 days.Hurry..oh…and sweet zombie dreams (lyrics below)
Download: It’s beginning to stink like lots of Zombies by joining the mailing list
It’s beginning to stink like lots of zombies
It’s beginning to stink like lots of zombies
Ev’rywhere you go;
Take a peep at your barricades glistening once again
With innards and their really smelling foul
It’s beginning to look a lot like the end.
bodies everywhere
But the scariest sight to see is God’s own undead spawn
at my own front door.
Bouncing betties and gpmg
is the wish of granny and dad.
The dead that won’t talk and won’t go for a walk
Is the hope of Janice and Jen;
And Mom and Dad can hardly wait for the raids to end it all
It’s the beginning of the armageddon
Ev’rywhere you go;
Santa’s dangling from the tree, he’s swinging from his guts
And he really doesn’t seem to mind the snow.
It’s beginning to look a lot like the end;
The air raid sirens sing
And the thing that will make it stop, is give up give up now
Let us eat your braaaaaiins….
(PS: Taking a break from the studio and I’ve been playing way too much plants vs zombies…this picture I got while firing cob cannons while my brother pressed “printscreen” on the ready…we all need polaroid pictures of zombie kills)
Mirrored from Yunyu. |
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| Magic: For Those Who Are Interested |
[Dec. 21st, 2009|03:36 pm] |
So I built my first Elder Dragon Highlander deck last night. The general? Sapling of Colfenor. Why? Because I already had a B/G highlander deck (fairly successful in multiplayer) that I could adapt.
I'm not gonna write about it until I have a chance to play it, but I laid it out here because it's kind of like a puzzle - those who know Magic art well can see what cards I chose (barring basic land). Yes, it has a lot of powerful cards. But that's the way I like it!
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| Avatar: A Fuller Review |
[Dec. 21st, 2009|11:17 am] |
Roger Ebert said that when he watched Avatar, he had the same feeling that he did when he saw Star Wars - that from-the-future sensation of "Oh, this is going to change everything." And in that, he is correct.
Avatar is what movies will look like ten years from now, because it is the first movie in which they have gotten CGI and 3D right.
CGI's always been dicey because despite its tremendous usage, it still has yet to get heft and movement correct. There's something about non-human CGI that looks CGI - it's pretty, but the mind is subliminally aware that the way gravity interacts with things doesn't quite fit together. They've fixed most of that for humans, because you can (and should) motion-capture people - but for the other things like tumbling rocks or CGI animals, subliminally your mind still knows it's all just equations in a box somewhere. It's close, so you're willing to go with it, but somewhere in the back of your head you said, "It's a special effect."
Avatar has a whole CGI forest, and you buy every tree in it. There were points I kept having to remind myself that it was CGI, because that bioluminescent frond jiggled just perfectly when the fake character brushed against it. I don't know what they did to simulate mass correctly, but they did, and I bought the world wholesale.
That is an amazing feat. Let us congratulate James Cameron for that.
And the 3D? There were times I kept forgetting it was 3D, which sounds like a waste but it wasn't. This is the first movie where I've said, "Seeing this in 2D, the movie would lose something I don't want to live without." Sure, you can see shit like Journey to the Center of the Earth on your TV and miss out Brendan Frasier hocking a yo-yo in your eye, but who cares? But Avatar uses 3D to enhance the action scenes without making you aware that dude, you're in a 3D theater, isn't this awesome?
I'll state again: in ten years, this is what cinema will look like. Just like Terminator 2, he's taken umpty-million dollar and put every dollar of that money on-screen. It may, in fact, be one of the prettiest movies ever.
That is an amazing feat. Let us congratulate James Cameron for that.
Now. Let's discuss the plot.
I know I'll catch shit for this, but I'm not instinctively opposed to the "white guy meets noble savage" plot. It's hoary and can be completely insulting when done poorly (and yes, is mildly insulting when done well) - but the fact is that if you have some alien culture in a movie, the simplest and easiest way to introduce a reader to that culture is to have them experience it through the eyes of someone who is also new. It's lazy writing, but it's also effective, because at the moment your lead character is falling in love with this new set of people, so is your viewer.
(And sadly, at this moment in time "white guy" is going to be the stand-in for the viewer when Hollywood's involved - a regrettable choice I've come wearily to accept probably won't change in the next ten years. Although I'll disagree with some folks who've said that the underlying problems would evaporated if this had been Will Smith in the lead instead.)
The trick is, pulling off that plot is all about the subtlety. It can be done well, if white guy helps out the tribe but doesn't turn out to be the greatest warrior, the most intelligent planner, and the most swoony lover by mere nature of the fact that he exists and is white. So I said, "Self, I'm gonna hold off on this until I see how much finesse he applies. It's all about the subplots."
Avatar has no subplots.
Avatar has no finesse.
I'm going to reference Neil Gaiman's party theory here and say that most Hollywood films at least try to answer the question, "Why do I want to hang around this guy for the next two hours of my life? What makes him likeable?" Avatar is amazing because it sidesteps that question in its entirety.
The lead character is introduced as a man who lost the use of his legs and has a dead brother. How did he lose the use of his legs? In "a battle" in Venezuela. We don't know what the nature of the battle was, how he felt about the loss of his legs (aside from "he'd like them back"), what kind of soldier he was before. Nothing. And his relationship with his brother? Was it good? Bad? Is he driven by guilt, a need to supercede his brother, some need to make up for his brother's crimes? We have absolutely no clue why he's here or what he wants to accomplish aside from two facts - and those facts could mean any number of things.
Say what you will about Titanic, but at least at the beginning we knew that Rose wanted to be free of her too-strict societal conventions and Jack wanted freedom. The lead dude in Avatar is so blank that he's running on pure actorly charm - thank God the guy has a nice smile, because that smile is all the characterization you're gonna get.
So the emotional arc? Is completely stunted. Yes, of course lead dude falls in love with the civilization and defects to the other side, but do we know what it means to him personally aside from some sort of mishmash of The Earth is Good and Milspec Is Bad? Not really. We have no idea what he's personally rejecting in order to become a part of this world.
Any feelings you're gonna get from Avatar are coming straight from the SFX - it's like if Star Wars hadn't bothered to put in good dialogue (and yes, the original Star Wars has good dialogue, if not natural dialogue - check the number of quotable lines) and instead put all the weight on you feeling anything for Luke based on how awful that desert looked (so he'd want to leave) and how pretty the princess looked (so he'd want to follow her).
That's what Avatar is: a beautiful world where you're expected to fall in love with it just like the lead. Who doesn't really exist except as a hollow construct of actorly charm.
But the plot is thin, and often makes no fucking sense - rare for a James Cameron film. (I rather enjoyed how he went out of his way to show us why all that grand military equipment didn't work well against the Aliens.) ( In fact, let's ask the following questions... )
So what you get in the end is a very gorgeous movie where the natives, barring some very interesting biological quirks (I want an organic USB cable), don't have have the protective cladding of an interesting plot or fascinating characters to shield us from the knowledge that hey, these are Native Americans in blue garb! Which they are. They have the weapons of Native Americans, the vocal patterns of Native Americans, and the chanting and rituals of - well, Native Americans and some Africans. So suspension of disbelief, at least in that aspect, goes right out the window for anyone at all attuned to such things.
Let us bash James Cameron for that. His heart's probably somewhere in the vicinity of the right place, wanting us to love nature and people who love nature, but in the end what he creates is a fantasy where the native population is too butt-stupid to know how to fight the overwhelming power of the conquering civilization until the lead character comes along and shows them. In other words, the natives don't have the intelligence to build technology, and they don't have the wisdom to see the threat of the technology well enough to make plans to fight it effectively - but boy howdy, they have heart.
A heart that's only valuable because it can sucker a guy from that superior civilization into working for them. Otherwise? Toast. It's a value system that says, "You know, if only white guys had showed those Indians what to do, they'd have won!" Which, you know, is a little historically sketchy on so many levels that I don't even want to deconstruct that one.
It didn't ruin the movie for me, because it was extremely pretty. If I turned the brain off and watched the eye candy and said, "Holy crap, a mechasuit that looks mecha!" I was happy. Yet it was three hours long - and yes, viewers, I checked my watch twice. I'm not sure I'd go again by myself, but I'd happily take someone just to watch them gasp.
Avatar may be Hollywood's last gasp for the theater: You have to see this in the theater, in 3D. Have to. Because if you see it at home, on your crappy HDTV, the pretty's going to fade - and once the pretty fades, the plot is exposed for its underlying wreckage. And that plot? Hollow as a chocolate Easter bunny. It looks pretty, but most of your hungry bites are going to catch nothing but air. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 20th, 2009|12:10 pm] |
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So, what's everyone's take on anteaters? |
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| A Good Weekend |
[Dec. 20th, 2009|11:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Karen O - Where the Wild Things Are OST - Rumpus Reprise | ] |
Okay, time for me to say something that I seem to rarely be able to say. It's been a good weekend. There, I said it. And mean it, too. Always a bonus.
Did I get up to much? Not really, but what I did get up to was fun and satisfying. I spent more time with a smile on my face than without. That counts as a victory in my books.
Saturday was movies with zakzahn and niennahirilfea. The rather eclectic selection consisted of Where The Wild Things Are, Zombieland and Something, Somthing, Something Dark Side. None of them were bad, though they were varying degrees of good. Wild Things was, for my money, simply amazing, and one of those films that the term "Movie Magic" was invented for, though I would think twice before sending a child to see it. Zombieland was amusing and occasionally clever, and a decent choice for a Zomedy if someone has rented all the copies of Shaun of the Dead. Something was a little bit hit and miss, but when it did hit it could produce tears of laughter.
Today was dinner with keenie and the Katiemonster, which is always awesome. Dropped off their Christmas prezzies, and got to see Katie's ecstatic reaction to the Muppets DVD I had got her. Keenie just got three discs worth of Bastista porn. Somehow, I think she is happy with that :p
Two days of work and then I go on holiday until the middle of January. Damn am I looking forward to that. Happy holidays peoples, just in case I do get to do it later. |
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| Glurge |
[Dec. 19th, 2009|10:03 pm] |
Periodically, I get glurge emails from strangers and regrettable relatives about the War In Iraq. It's generally some heartwarming story of a soldier who saved a kid or was kind to a family or rescued a cat, with a picture of one of Our Boys doing something noble that is uplifting all of Iraq, and it always ends with something like, "THE MEDIA REFUSES TO REPORT WHAT WE'RE REALLY DOING IN IRAQ! SPREAD THE WORD!"
Of course, I also get horrendous emails from strangers and regrettable relatives that show the ruins of bombed houses where a wedding was destroyed by a bomb or an innocent cabbie was shot at a checkpoint or a cat was stomped on, with a picture of some blood-soaked gore that shows how Our Boys have done something horrific that's brought down all of Iraq, and it always ends with something like, "THE MEDIA REFUSES TO REPORT WHAT WE'RE REALLY DOING IN IRAQ! SPREAD THE WORD!"
I think in the future, I'll just forward these emails to each other sender, saying, "Pro-glurge person, meet anti-glurge person. Perhaps by seeing the other side using your dimwit tactics, you will realize that unsourced, anecdotal data does not create a whole picture. Now please. Shut the fuck up." |
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| It's That Time of Year |
[Dec. 19th, 2009|05:07 pm] |
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I saw Mommy KILLING Santa Claus Underneath the Mistletoe last MURDER!!! |
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| This Is Why You're Dumb |
[Dec. 19th, 2009|11:37 am] |
Senator Ben Nelson has agreed to vote for the new health care bill, giving 60 votes to the Democrats and - barring further complications - assuring that the bill should pass before Christmas. Regardless of whether you think this is a triumph or a tragedy, I think we can all agree this is fairly important news.
However, on the front page of Yahoo, this piece of news is listed after "Singer's Lip-Syncing Gaffe" and "$22,000 Cell Phone Bill." |
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| Review Suggestions |
[Dec. 19th, 2009|11:12 am] |
So. Thus far, I have reviewed two magazines for the Monthly Magazine review: GUD Magazine and Shimmer. Weird Tales is currently in my airline carry-on bag, and when I finish that I'll be caught up-to-date.
My question: Which magazine should I review next? As mentioned, my criteria are that it has to be a semi-pro publication that pays at least one cent a word. It would also help a lot if said magazine was something I could take with me, either via PDF or paper; I often read these things in airports, when I have a lot of attention to spare, and requiring an Internet connection to read means that I can't mow through a couple of zines on a plane.
I'd also prefer not to read Asimov's, Analog, or F&SF - not that they're not grand, but I'd like to highlight places that could really use a few new readers.
Any suggestions? |
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| Heartbroken In Roanoke |
[Dec. 18th, 2009|03:08 pm] |
Thanks to a snowstorm that's threatened to dump twenty inches onto Virginia and a series of unfortunate airline events, I am now stuck in Roanoke through Sunday.
I feel sad because I was going to have a Christmas movie marathon on Saturday with Gini and butterandjelly, and then Avatar in the evening. Now I am all saddened.
If you have anything you think would cheer a stranded weasel up, I'm listenin'! |
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| Friending Frenzy II: Friend Harder! |
[Dec. 18th, 2009|08:54 am] |
Because it's been nine months, let's have a friending frenzy!
In the comments, you leave some personal information about yourself, explaining why someone would want to read your journal; in this way, all you fascinating people will find your way to each other.
There's one twist, though: You must, as your last line, list your favorite movie. If you can't pick a favorite movie, as many can't, then pick your favorite movie that you've seen in the last year. If you don't have a favorite movie, then you baffle me. Here, I'll go first:
I'm Ferrett. I swing wildly between the poles of "completely obscene" and "tender notes to my wife," with a healthy dose of puns to liven it up. I like big questions that can't really be answered; I like exploring gray zones where only fools have a clear answer. In short, I like staring at the bits of humanity which nobody can really answer clearly. I'm also trying to go professional as a writer, which means that I spend far too much time blathering on about the details of fiction. This is probably good, though, since it's stopped me from blathering about Rock Band as much.
My favorite movie cycles between "Star Wars," "The Godfather," and "Galaxy Quest," which really doesn't say much about me because hell, they're all pop culture icons. If I had to pick my favorite movie of the last year, then I'd have to say The Hurt Locker - which I reviewed here, but if you don't want to read that I'll say it's the kind of movie that many will hate. It's more tense than most horror films, given that it's about a man defusing bombs in Iraq, and yet it has a strong character at the center that makes you wonder why the hell this guy is launching himself headlong into the most dangerous assignments? It's a film that I'm not sure I want to watch a lot, but I will buy it when it comes out on DVD (a rarity these days) because I know I'll be saying, "You never saw Hurt Locker?" and leap to my shelves so they can borrow it immediately.
(Second-best movie: Moon. Up probably should be on there, but Moon - which is reviewed in the same entry - surprised me more.) |
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| Fart-chan Mark II |
[Dec. 18th, 2009|12:43 am] |
Tubgirl staggered and finally collapsed. "You...you have defeated me," she gasped.
"No," Fart-chan replied. "It was you who defeated yourself." |
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| The Way I Am |
[Dec. 17th, 2009|05:42 pm] |
FERRETT: [tails off after long, involved explanation to Aaron about the benefits of redesigning this database]
AARON: That made no sense.
FERRETT: That's okay - I just realized it was a terrible idea.
AARON: All right.
FERRETT: Actually, in a way it's a win-win, because if my explanation had made sense and you'd bought it, then I would have had to talk you out of it. |
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| Quick Question |
[Dec. 17th, 2009|08:33 am] |
I'm busy today, so for proper entertainment let's ask a question:
What's the worst thing you've ever tasted, and why?
I'm gonna have to go with the black tea-infused vodka created by the mad geniuses at Infusions of Grandeur. Yes, I know, I have a long and storied history of eating awful things just to see what they taste like, but that black tea... It was like all the bitter astringency of tea combined with all the hot, sweaty bits of alcohol I don't like, and even now I cringe to think about it.
Actually, no, retract that. The worst thing I ever tasted was Mashed Potato Soda. I'll quote from my own review:"You would think that a bland flavor like Mashed Potato wouldn't be the worst of the bunch, but immediately after the '1... 2... 3... swig!' we had everyone hunched over, gagging. You couldn't even taste the soda - just this fake, overwhelming waxy butter scent, like a cheap vanilla candle you'd scoop out of the K-Mart bargain bin dipped in rancid popcorn butter, spiked with the chemical ammonia scent of artificial sugar. If that was the case, it would fade, but this stuff stuck to your tongue like flypaper, coating it like syrup, so within seconds everyone was being suffocated by the cloying taste and smacking their lips like a dog eating peanut butter. It didn't help. We clutched our throats like we had offended Darth Vader, feeling this mockery of a taste climb onto our tastebuds and hump it while we scrambled for water. Like the green bean casserole, it might have been okay as a carbonated version of the original, but for some unGodly reason they decided to make it sweet. Lord help us." What I didn't mention is that this taste would reappear at random throughout the night, like the Tsavo man-eating lions, thanks to the carbonation involved. One little burp, and your mouth would be refilled with chemical napalm, as though it had never left.
All right, I've relived my worst memories. Now you relive yours. What's the worst thing you've ever tasted? |
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| Iron Man 2 Trailer |
[Dec. 17th, 2009|10:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  geeky | ] |
Just watched. Two words: War Machine. Two more words: I'm sold. |
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| And now a blistering pork solo! |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|09:04 pm] |
SPORTS!
Any particular one?
No! SPORTS!
No wrecks? Garsh!
Let's rip out his copper wiring - that stuff really sells!
Put on your 3-piece pajamas, son.
Castle Films: butchering peasants and putting their heads on the spikes of Xmas!
Did I catch those correctly? |
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| an interesting approach |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|08:35 pm] |
A young Jewish autistic is about to be Bar Mitzvah-ed, that is, celebrate his coming of age at 13, Usually, the child reads from the Torah (Bible) in Hebrew and often delivers a sermon. The youngster in question however is non verbal. The dilemma: how to perform a significant ceremony. The solution: the congregation leaves the synagogue, all but nine. Since ten adults are required for a number of important prayers, the young man will be the one to make the tenth, thus acknowloging his becoming a grown up. Then everyone comes back. It seems like a good idea to me. |
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| so, wait... |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|04:58 pm] |
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... Rifftrax Live is only live in L.A.? i'm following along with them on Twitter, and they appear to be starting now. did i miss something? |
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| Humanity |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|09:32 am] |
Look, I like humanity. Most of my best friends are human. I'm just not convinced we're the greatest thing ever.
I mean, humanity's done a lot for me, but in the end I think of us as another kind of animal. Yes, we have brainpower, which is delightful - but that brain is seriously flawed, riddled with shortcuts and gaps that we're not even aware of, all devised because there's just too much information for one mammal to process properly without condensing it down. Our memories are scattershot (just compare eyewitness reports to what's on the videotape), our ability to predict our own happiness is tragically flawed, and our native understanding of statistics and threat levels is laughable.
It's better than most of what's on the planet, mind you, but that doesn't make it the best there could ever be.
So when I see that there's seven billion of us walking around, chewing up the forests and dumping plastic in the oceans, I think, "Well, that's probably enough." I'm just not feelin' the same level of triumph that others apparently do that we've conquered the globe. I'm closer to, "Actually, there could probably be fewer of us."
At which point someone inevitably walks up, their face lit with the transcendence of an Unbeatable Argument, and sniffs, "Well... What if your mother had felt the same way?"
My answer is, "What if she had?" I'm not egotistic enough to think that the entire planet has been illuminated by my presence. I've been good to some people, sure, but I've also been shitty to others, and on the whole if my Mom hadn't had me I'm sure she'd have gotten by - probably with some other kid, who might have even been better for her.
I'm not convinced that I'm irreplaceable in this cosmos. I'm not convinced that the mere act of being human makes you marvelous and special, especially considering you couldn't help it. I mean, if you'd had to pass some sort of embryonic test to be born as human, and if you washed out you got born as a kitten or an ant, then I might be impressed. As it is, it feels uncomfortably to me like that kind of rah-rah go our team! bullshit we get in sports, where we all get behind a random group of guys because we happened to be born near the sports stadium they play at. Go, homo sapiens!
Mind you, I'm not saying you shouldn't have kids if it makes you happy. Happiness is in short supply, so if that's gonna float your boat, go squirt out a couple. I'm just saying that your children, and you, and me, and pretty much everyone we know? We're another organism on the planet. I like you, I'll certainly have a laugh with you at a party, but I remain firmly unconvinced that any of us are the pinnacle of all that there is.
I love my wife. My wife loves me. We need each other dearly. And yet I'm pretty sure neither of us are irreplaceable on the planetary scale. That's just how I see it. |
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| Sleep Like An Egyptian |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|08:20 am] |
I use my iPhone as an alarm clock. It has a "snooze" button that allows me to catch an extra nine minutes of sleep. This morning, I made an amazing discovery.
If I lay on my back and place the iPhone in the exact center of my chest, then cross my arms, I become Ferrettankhamen, ancient mummy, frozen only by the power of the black techno-scarab. And when the time is nigh and the stars are right, that black scarab will jitter and sing, and He will rise from the grave to devour you all.
...or He'll hit the "snooze" button again. Either way, my sleep was surprisingly comforting. |
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| I happened to watch this tonight |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|09:54 pm] |
I was reminded as I watched Sing Off tonight. Then I made a playlist of MST3k songs (that is way too short)</a> when I realized that there was all this great MST3k music on YouTube. I'm listening to the Final Justice clip now.
"Take the roast and wrap it in bacon, but there's potatoes on the side - Yeah, pass the gravy now!"
...
"Meatballs fried in la-a-aard" |
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| Walking in a Zombie Wonderland |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|11:11 am] |
FREE Zombie Christmas Songs for DOWNLOADS
I’ve been wanting to do these zombie chrismas songs for a good long while. Somehow, the image of crying toddlers, scary parents with bulldozing prams, violent shoving shoppers remind me of the zombie apocalypse. Either that or I’m not very good at melding through crowds…or you may say that I am quite simply…THE Grinch.
So as promised. Here’s a merry new year and happy christmas gift to everyone from Your Royal Madness. (lyrics below) About Rudolph being Patient Zero in a zombie world. Major uber thanks to my manager for going along with this and happily helping me on my way to being excommunicated and sent to the island of eternal repent. (oh goody…always wanted me own island…yaaaarrr.)
Download here: Walking in a Zombie Wonderland
And if and ONLY if you sign up to my mailing list, there’s THE SEQUEL that will be delivered in secret links via newsletters in the next week. So sign up! sign up!
Else…if you have already done so…feel free to
tweet link Walking in a Zombie Wonderland
retweet,
blog,
bug editors of other blogs….like this one ( io9) , if it gets covered there…it makes MY christmas.
Sabotage/ replace this song in your neighbour’s christmas collections
for the truly demented…I never told you to teach this to your underaged niece/ nephew/ spawn…bad minion, down minion, no no NO Minion….
or…for something a little more more constructive…
. tell people to sign up to the mailing list for the sequel
. drop money into my paypal christmas stockings (You may treat this as a form of online busking)
(All proceeds go to the making of the video clip of the “cannot be named” single in the new album. I’m raising some dosh specifically for a hire of a Red Camera. Most of the team from “Lenore’s Song” has gathered again, we’re putting funds, blood, sweat and tears into it again, all for the incurable love of entertainment and additional help from you, the minions, would go a very very long way to helping us on our way. So go forth, spread the word, spread the widget. Your royal madness needs you more than ever now. More about the video clip in the next post.)
Till next time,
YRM
Yunyu
Sign up sign up sign up!!
ps: soul’s Alive is still available as a FREE download should you sign up for the mailing list. The gathering of the minions is the first step to my minionship of zombie armies of sorts.
Oh yes …the lyrics…
Walking in a Zombie Wonderland
Sleigh bells ring
are you listening
in the north
ice caps are melting
there a virus awakes
and quickly infects
Rudolph with a dripping red nose
who ate my reindeers
says Santa
you’ll have to do
Red nosed reindeer
You look a terrible sight
But I’m on a deadline
Teleporting through the christmas wonderlands
Patient Zero was a kindly old man
Last seen running from a crazy deer
Neighbours say it might be Reindeer Rabies
That’s why he’s on a biting spree in town….
Put him down
they conspired
He didn’t stay down
the spread is dire
Now they’re missing half a torso
and still chewing human morsels
Walking in a zombie wonderland
On the border we will build barricades
We will scan for marks and zombie bites
We’ll say “Are you human”
if you say ” No man”
We will blow your brains to “jingle bells”
Nuclear raids
Ain’t it thrilling
though our skins get to peeling
we’ll spasm and lurch
the dead human way
Walking in a zombie wonderland
Gone away are the humans
Here to stay are the zombies
We’ll spasm and lurch
the dead human way
walking in the zombie wonderland
twitching in the zombie wonderland
lurching in the zombie wonderland
Mirrored from Yunyu. |
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| Officially Diagnosed With Asperger's |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|12:24 pm] |
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I just got officially diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome by my new psychologist. I've been seeing her mostly to get some help with getting a job. Today she brought Asperger's up to me. She took the DSM-IV off the shelf and started reading off the traits and asked if it sounded like traits I have. I was saying "yes" to them until eventually I just said I knew what she was talking about. Then she later told me "This is what you have. This is your diagnosis." I was surprised because out of all the therapists I had, no one ever figured it out, but I never brought it up either. I feel like it's probably a good thing now I've been officially diagnosed, even though I've known it all along. It feels like I don't have to wonder about it anymore. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|01:13 pm] |
Anyone else going to see CT in Philly on NYE? I have my tickets, my hotel reservation and a restaurant reservation all set.
This will be the best NYE ever. |
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| Dinosaurs Must Die |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|08:34 am] |
I sometimes wonder what the music business would look like today if the music industry hadn't gotten greedy about CDs. CDs supposedly cost LESS to produce that cassettes or albums. And yet the record industry charged twice as much as cassettes - understandable when the technology was new and print runs were low, but they looked at this switch as an excuse to double the price permanently. It's like if new DVDs still cost $30. If they hadn't upped the price and instead had lowered it to make it accessible, would it have been harder to justify pirating? Oh, Napster would have gotten some traction regardless... But if that new CD cost you seven bucks instead of seventeen, would people have felt the same need to steal? Now, an entire generation's been taught to pirate. This is good for artists in many ways - concert attendance is way up - but the record industry is experiencing turbulence. I wonder where they'd be if they hadn't been so damn confident they could gouge us. Posted via LiveJournal.app. |
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| Apocalypse Nerd: E-E-E-lectricity |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|05:40 am] |
So in our continuing quest to make the house livable should The Shit Hit The Fan, my wife and I are now considering the question of power generators. And this finally forces us to answer a question we've been deftly avoiding:
So how serious are we about this stuff, anyway?
Generators, as it turns out, have a ton of options, but the relevant ones are fuel and wattage. You can go for the small-wattage generators that will run a hotplate and a TV, or the medium-wattage generators that will run a TV and a fridge and a fair number of lights at once - or you can go whole-hog and get a gennie that will run your whole house, including your central air conditioner.
(And if you go that crazy route of a 10,000-watt gennie, you're encouraged to get an electrician, who will install a transfer switch so that you can wire your whole house's electrical system into your backup generator at the flip of that switch. As Gini has noted, however, if you have an electrical generator you have to run close to a full load off of it or it will burn out. During the Great Power Outage a couple of years ago, our generator-powered neighbors had to run all their Christmas lights in the middle of the night just to avoid underload, which made it look like they were lording it over all of us. And as Gini notes, if we did spend $5,000+ to get a full backup, we'd have to run every light in the house whenever we turned it on. This seems like an awful advertising: "HEY, GUYS! LOOT US FIRST!")
So what we'd want would be a small generator, roughly 2,000-3,000 watts, that could power a bunch of stuff simultaneously: a heater, a TV, our fridge, our computers, several lights. And the big question is, "For how long?"
See, the easiest solution is propane. (...And propane accessories.) Propane stores forever in canisters that can be purchased and forgotten - unlike gasoline, which goes bad in about a year or two. We can use propane for our barbecue, which will serve both cooking and emergency heating needs. And gasoline is often the first thing to dry up in case of emergency (as happened during Katrina), so depending upon gasoline seems like a poor apocalypse nerd choice.
However, depending upon any processed fuel is a poor apocalypse nerd choice, in the long run. What your die-hard nerd really wants is a biodiesel generator, which can run off of vegetable oil. (It gets a little more complicated than that, apparently, since you'll have to do some processing and prep the generator, but in general it can be done.) If there's a real long-term catastrophe that runs for not months but years, having a generator that can run off of stuff we can grow will be vital.
So what kind of apocalypse are you readying yourself for, nerd? A couple of months of inconvenience before the gummint kicks back in again? Or is this settling in for the long haul?
Oh, you can have a tri-fuel generator, but then we're talking not hundreds of saved dollars, but thousands. And jfargo was touting a small solar panel connected to a battery for a steady, surreptitious stream of low-wattage power - but again, my early estimations show that it'd be about $2,000 for the installation. That's a lot of moolah for a "Hey, maybe this will happen."
I think - think - we'll probably save up for a propane generator, which runs about $300-700, and then buy a bunch of propane fuel - enough where, with judicious usage of a couple of hours a day, we could last a month or two. (Although rough estimates on how long a canister of propane will fuel a small generator are maddeningly hard to find on the Internet.) Again, the chances of the shit hitting the fan so that we'll survive in this new, no-government world are slim indeed, and realistically we're just looking to survive a power outage that lasts a couple of weeks.
Could we regret this when The Shit Hits The Fan? Of course we could. Could we also regret spending our hard-earned cash on a generator we never use? Absolutely. The Apocalypse Nerd walks a fine line between "preparing for the worst" and "living in a fantasy world where all your savings go towards purchasing things that are absolutely useless outside of a societal collapse." In this case, we'll be better prepared than the vast majority of people - but not as prepared as the really fucking batshit.
I can live with that. Until The Shit Hits The Fan and it turns out that I can't. Whoops. |
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| Geek seeks geek for photography |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|08:08 pm] |
dalekboy posts:
I'm looking for a Canberra (or nearby) based geek girl, preferably with a nice pair of geek girl glasses, for a photoshoot idea. Costume would ideally be fur bikini ala Raquel Welch in One Million B.C.. Is this you, or a friend? Contact me for details. No money, but a full set of photos from the shoot would be provided.
I can think of several geek girls in Canberra who might do this, and those that I can think of read my LJ :D (I don't know him terribly well, but I've been in a room with him, and know women that are his friends, so he probably won't kill you, cut you into pieces, and put you in the freezer. Probably.) |
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| twilight done right |
[Dec. 15th, 2009|01:44 am] |
I hope that I'm not breaking any rules by posting this here, but I thought since it was the mst3k characters doing what they do best it might be appreciated here
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| Airplane travel question |
[Dec. 14th, 2009|11:09 pm] |
So I just had several (semi-traumatic) flights to and from Vienna, Austria (from San Francisco, CA) last month. I was able to cope with most everything, except one thing, which I figured I'd ask you inimitable folks before embarking on my next flight, to Oklahoma, on Thursday.
**How/what do you do when you're sitting in a seat, say on a plane, and the person next to you keeps *touching* you, either by putting their arm in your seat or by taking up the entire arm-rest-area into your seat-personal-space?
I had this happen on all but one of my flights (5) to/from Vienna last month, and they were without exception male seat-mates.
For some reason, being a female, I wouldn't feel so.... violated(?) if it were a lady touching my side-boob/back fat with their arm. (I am chubby, but DO NOT take up more than my own seat space. I put my arms between the armrests so I am definitely NOT taking up more than my own alotted space. I travel economy-plus, and cannot afford an upgrade to first, otherwise I would because being touched by jmale strangers freaks me out that badly.) |
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